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Never Fall In Love With An Unaccountable Person

This is a very pertinent question to settle! The issue of accountability is so important that if you can settle it, half of your issues are settled already.

Why is this so? I will tell you.
God has orchestrated His kingdom in such a way that you cannot decide to be in isolation. Any man who chooses to live in isolation will die in desolation.
If a man or woman has a lot of issues, but remains accountable to some authority figures, he will eventually make headway.
If there were a person who doesn’t appear to have issues but is not accountable to anyone, he would eventually have a lot of issues.
The kingdom of God is in hierarchies. The man is the head of the wife. Christ is the head of the church. Elisha needed Elijah. Jesus Christ needed a John the Baptist. The disciples’ destinies were domiciled in Christ first before they could be unleashed.
In my counseling experiences, there are some issues I couldn't wade into especially when the husband is the issue and he is not willing to talk to me. Once he does not give me permission into his life, I couldn't do anything.
A wife calls me. She narrates what she is going through. It is obvious the husband needs to be talked to before the marriage crashes. But it is the wife that called. So, I couldn't call the husband directly because he doesn't know me. When you call a man like that out of the blues, he would become defensive and the situation would worsen.
"You are reporting me all over town?” That would be his standard response.
So, what is the next thing to do?
The conversation would usually go like this:
"Who is your husband's pastor?"
"Oh, he has none, he only goes to church once in a while. The pastor cannot talk to him."
"Ok, what about his parents?"
"Pastor, he doesn't listen to his parents?" His parents cannot talk to him.
"Who else does he respect?" Family members?
"Nobody sir!"
At that point, there is nothing else we can do other than to pray for the man, and trust that God will send help to him in some supernatural ways.
Everybody that could have been of help in his life has been kept at bay. The same thing goes for a lady in that kind of context.
You see, God has a way of surrounding you with the help you need at any point in time. But when you are too proud to “condescend,” that help is incapacitated!
As singles, don’t fall in love with a person who is not accountable. You see, at every point in life, there has to be someone in your life you can be reported to.
I have always said that a relationship or courtship is not supposed to be a secret cult. Nothing about it should be hidden. So, when a guy or lady is telling you that you should keep your relationship secret, you should smell the rat there. Something is not quite right.
As singles, it would be a gross mistake to give your heart to someone who has no pastor, mentor or other authority figures over his life. It is either the person is ignorant or simply proud!
If you are in a relationship, and you have no mentors or other authority figures over your life, you need to patiently and prayerfully look for someone to play that role in your lives. You need a Pastor you can trust that would not use your issue as an example in your church on the pulpit. You need someone you can trust, confide in and you can call or reach at any time, even in the middle of the night.
That is a lot of wisdom for you, because some of the issues that are lingering in your life, marriage or home and have caused months of strife, the solutions could be only a few sentences away in somebody’s mouth.
The glory of old men is in their grey hair. There is something that elderly man has seen that is causing him to use glasses! You don’t need to go through that route again, you can learn from such a person and avoid his mistakes!
May God grant you more understanding on this issue!

I will be exalted because God exalts the humble


Lord, surround me with people that will aid my destiny in Jesus name


He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed. (Proverbs 13:20 KJV)

Discuss who you will be accountable to

Psalms 65-67, 69-70

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About Me

Pastor Dunamis Okunowo

Dunamis & Sophia are facilitators of Kisses and Huggs Club. They are ministers, writers, conference speakers, relationship counselors and marriage...

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