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Sex And Building Up Your Self Esteem

1. It is a “self” thing.

In building up your self esteem, the first thing I will like you to note is that it is a “self issue!” That is why it is called “self esteem!”
It is not lecturer esteem or father esteem or boyfriend esteem. It is self esteem.
In having a good self esteem, you are not seek it from anybody, you can only build it by yourself by giving yourself to study of God’s word which will then strengthen you from within.

"For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well." (Psa 139:13-14, KJV)

Low self esteem has driven many into sexual promiscuity. They really want somebody to affirm them. Such people must be in a relationship overtime because they feel incomplete without a boyfriend or girlfriend. But you see, you cannot get from a man what is designed to come from God and His word.
When you go into a relationship or get married for the sole purpose of building your esteem, it usually would not work out because you would eventually be disappointed. Why is that? It is not a job for man, it is a job for your God.
So it is called self esteem, because nobody can study God’s word for you. You have to do it yourself. It is called self esteem because you are supposed to build up your personal prayer life instead of looking around for some prophets who will end up deceiving you.
It is not siblings' esteem, not uncle's esteem and definitely it is not pastor's esteem. Self discovery and purpose discovery are a personal journey you must embark on.
When you discover God’s purpose for your life, it will stabilise your emotions and you will not be driven to and fro by the storms and winds of life. When you know God’s plan for your marriage, you will not even consider it when a married man comes around telling you all kinds of lies.
When you have a good self esteem, you will not be persuaded into sex by guys who are only looking for fun.
Now listen to this, you will never be able to build up your self esteem through sex. That is not what your body is designed to do.
Your body is not meant to be used as a weapon to get what you want. Don't reduce what God calls His temple to what is cheaply available to all and sundry. Raise your shoulder and embrace the dignity with which you are created.
On the contrary, sex offers you a quick temporary feeling of being loved , but the feeling quickly disappears because feelings are fickle. After you are done, you find yourself back in the deep gully of low self esteem. You then need to offer your body more to get some love and affirmation, but it will always end in frustration because that is not what God designed you for.
It is simply not worth it!

I am handsome/beautiful


Lord, endue me with divine strength to live right


"Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation!"  (Psa 139:13-14, MSG)

Decide to have right attitudes

2 Chronicles 1; Psalm 72

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About Me

Pastor Dunamis Okunowo

Dunamis & Sophia are facilitators of Kisses and Huggs Club. They are ministers, writers, conference speakers, relationship counselors and marriage...

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