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The Leaving, The Cleaving Without Grieving

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 KJV)

Here, we see God giving an instruction once marriage is in view. There must be “leaving” and a “cleaving” before any marriage can be successful.
A lot of people leave without cleaving. It won’t work. A lot more try to cleave without leaving. It won’t work either.
It has to be a “leaving” and a “cleaving.”
The word “leaving” is very interesting. There are two particular words or meanings I am interested in. They are the words ‘relinquish” and “commit self”
Pastor, you mean I must relinquish relationship with my parents? It doesn’t mean you disconnect from them or cut off from them, it only talks about where your focus should now be as a married person.
After God, the next most important person in your life is your spouse. It doesn’t mean you should not take care of your parents any longer, it just means there should be more emphasis on your spouse.
And then the word “commitment!” Leaving to cleave involves commitment! A person that goes into a relationship or marriage without the willingness to commit to the relationship is just playing around.
You need to pray as a single that your path will not cross with such people because they would waste your time, energy and resources. Yorubas call such people “alawin”
It is not God’s concept to have several people on your list that you are dating at a time. If God wanted some form of double dating or polygamy, He would have created Eve, Eva and Evelyn for Adam. Remember Adam still had ribs remaining.
But God created only one person upon whom Adam should focus on. And that is the biblical standard! In that one person is packaged everything you need to be complete. Couples who constantly fight and quarrel are missing out a lot because they are never complete that way. Their agreement would be broken and prayer would be hindered
Then the word “cleaving” is even more interesting.
It means to cling and to adhere, to catch by pursuit, to follow close and hard after, and to be joined together!
If you are married, read that again. Is that what you are doing with your spouse or have you been distracted? If you are single, are you ready to commit yourself? I once heard about a newly wedded couple where the husband slept with the bride’s best friend on the wedding night! Now, that’s really bad!
That kind of man doesn’t understand leaving and cleaving! A person whose marriage is a few months away and yet is still sleeping with other girls as a form of send forth for them obviously doesn’t understand what we are talking about here!
In marriage, God has called you into leaving and cleaving!
Your parents must be respected but you must “leave them!” How do you leave them? No decision must be taken to please them at the expense of your spouse! You must seek to please your spouse first! When your mum is still running the family after marriage, you haven’t left properly and because you didn’t do that, issues will soon rear their heads!
I pray that God will grant you more wisdom. Singles who try to cleave with jeru trip before they are married are badly cemented and they lose God’s favour and blessings as a result, unless they genuinely repent and have a change of ways.
It is always good to leave and cleave properly because there are always consequences for every seed you sow.
Singles, never try to cleave without leaving first. When you do that, it is like putting the cart before the horse! There will be marital accidents that way! Ladies who relocate to their boyfriend’s house in a bid to secure the relationship are trying to cleave without leaving.
As I conclude this morning, I want you to strive to follow God and do it His own way. That way, you will eliminate a lot of issues that might crop up from disobeying God.
I pray for you this morning that God will infuse you with divine strength to do it the right way!

I am not disobedient to God. I am quick to hear and obey.

Lord, teach me your ways that I may do it your way


Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh.(Genesis 2:24 Message)

Study "leaving" and "cleaving"

1 Samuel 4-8

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About Me

Pastor Dunamis Okunowo

Dunamis & Sophia are facilitators of Kisses and Huggs Club. They are ministers, writers, conference speakers, relationship counselors and marriage...

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