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Dear Pastor, my fiancee believes we can do every other thing aside from Jeru trap. He feels touching and petting is not a sin. He is the youth leader in the church and I am the Vice president. I am beginning to get scared because it nearly led to Jeru trap the last time. He suddenly became wild. What can we do? I really love him. Please, KHC don't judge me, I am only asking for advice!
my dear are you sure he is the will of God for you. it is not matter of if you love if him or not but what God is saying about him. God is not an authour of confussion. if he is the will of God for you, you have to go back to God and pray for grace to overcome sin. talk to him one on one and let him kno the truth and the end result of what he is doing.
Please, let's get this right. Because the fiancee touches her doesn't mean he is not be the will of God. There is a physical attraction when two people are in love, but maturity sets in when both of them can refrain themselves. I don't mean to sound like an unbeliever, but let's say it the way it is (as this has happened to me several times, but i do refrain myself from yielding to the flesh, well, i do hold his hands sha).
What i will like to tell this lady is that, ask your fiancee if what he does 'edifies God'. If he doesn't think it edifies God and cannot proudly tell his pastors that this is what he does at the back, then it need to be stopped. After which, both of you can go and see your pastor inorder to be accountable. But where he refuses, separate from him because he might have another motive.
Moreover, this cannot be achieved by words of mouth alone. Both of you need to be praying for each other, as there are pressure out there. Spend time to pray together, especially for the grace to withstand temptation/subdue the flesh and study the word. Moreover, what exactly do you discuss when you see? Talk more about your vision, purpose, future, family, and many more. There are a lot of things you can talk about when both of you see, i tell you, you can never ran out of words. Both of you should try and have a list of things to discuss when you see.